The Bucket List

Dying guys decide
To live last days to fullest
Travel, act like kids.


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National Treasure: Book of Secrets

Super-smart guy finds
Clues to hidden gold city
Government not pleased.


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Blonde Ambition

Sexy backwoods girl
Finds that city folks are cheats
Welcome to jungle.


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Alvin and the Chipmunks

Three singing chipmunks
Are worth a hefty fortune
Just keep them happy.


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I Am Legend

A sole man remains
To save earth from a virus
That creates zombies.


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The Golden Compass

Seek the meaning of
Parallel worlds joined by dust
Answer in sequels.


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The Deaths of Ian Stone

Problem for Ian
Daily, spectres hunt him down
Want his strength, they do.


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American Pie Presents: Beta House

Drunks and geeks battle
To be top fraternity
Naked girls abound.


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Enchanted

New look fairy tale
Eject princess to New York
Fish out of water!


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Jack Ketchum’s The Girl Next Door

Sick, surrogate mom
Exploits the girls in her care
A sickening tale.


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Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium

Crazy, zany store
Needs childlike adult to run
Wonka flick: better.


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Hitman

Raised from birth to kill
No social skills to speak of
Good thing dead can't talk.


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No Country for Old Men

To risk everything
For a bag full of money
Is a big mistake.


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Fred Claus

The Claus clan broken
St. Nick gets all the glory
Fred must overcome!


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Dan in Real Life

Advice columnist
Must follow his own counsel
To fix family.


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Beowulf

Norse hero arrives
To rid the land of evil
But gets cursed himself.


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P2

Working late at job
Can lead to very bad things
Next time leave on time.


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Lions for Lambs

Anti-Bush bias
Prevalent theme throughout film
A Democrats dream!


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Bee Movie

Young bee breaks the rules
Leaves hive to hang with humans
No good can result.


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Cougar Club

Guys create a club
Young guys hook up with old broads
It's all the rage now.


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The Darjeeling Limited

Three estranged brothers
Try to rekindle their bond
On Indian train.


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Saw IV

Jigsaw has returned
New bloody game is a test
Like The Apprentice.


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American Gangster

Traffic drugs; be king
Will it ever be enough?
The law comes knocking.


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The Comebacks

A parody film
Poking fun at sports movies
Fails miserably.


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30 Days of Night

Darkness swallows town
Vampires descend to feed
There is no escape.


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We Own the Night

Drugs run New York streets
Brother must decide which side
He wants -- crime or law?


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Run, Fat Boy, Run

Loser leaves girlfriend
Now that she's found a new love
He must have her back.


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Michael Clayton

Bad day for law firm
Make call for Michael Clayton
He'll clean it up, right?


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Joe Strummer: The Future Is Unwritten

Punk visionary
Must rediscover himself
Through the music, Joe!


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Feel the Noise

No talent rapper
Gets sent to Puerto Rico
Bonds with less gifted.


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The Heartbreak Kid

Eddie can't find love
Marries the next girl he meets
His mistake; our laughs.

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Eastern Promises

A baby is born
The Russian mob want it dead
Are they all heartless?


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The Game Plan

Cocky football star
Has illegitimate child
World turned upside down.


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The Kingdom

A terrorist strike
Retaliate, is first thought
Is it always best?


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Resident Evil: Extinction

Alice comes again
To slaughter the infected
Will it ever end?


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Good Luck Chuck

Guy can't keep a girl
Is it because of a curse?
Nope, he's an asshole.


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Full of It

Sam decides to fib
When they come to pass he learns
Lying does not pay.


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The Brothers Solomon

Two dimwit brothers
Must polish their social skills
To raise a baby.


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The Brave One

Life turned upside down
Courts fail her; she needs justice
Is revenge the way?


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Mr. Woodcock

Mean Mr. Woodcock
Cruel, abusive and cranky
Does he deserve love?


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3:10 to Yuma

Rancher needs money
Will risk life and limb to lead
Outlaw to justice.


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Shoot ‘Em Up

Mister Smith saves child
Loads of people want him dead
Selflessness is tough.


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Wrong Turn 2: Dead End

Cannibals in woods
Hunt kids in a TV show
If caught become food.


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Death Sentence

Perps kill family
No justice in the courtroom
Must exact revenge.


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Balls of Fury

Ping-pong champion
Must rise to face nemesis
Where is the humor?


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War

Cop loses partner
Vows to kill those who slew him
Revenge consumes all.


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Halloween

Classic is remade
With more violence and blood
Why? I'm not so sure.


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The TV Set

TV programming
Who knew it was so crazy?
Dave Duchovny did.


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Closing Escrow

Follow three couples
As they search for a new home
Stress can be funny.


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Becoming Jane

A young Jane Austen
Is helped by experience
To write great novels.


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Superbad

Lonely highschool dorks
They act cool to get noticed
Best to be yourself.


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The Invasion

Alien virus
Engulfs the mind; makes zombies
But there is world peace!


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Stardust

A fantasy tale
About true love, power, youth
Will the star provide?


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Rush Hour 3

Chan, Tucker are back
Against the Triad they fight
Retire, they should.


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Daddy Day Camp

Stupid comedy
Father rus a summer camp
Lost; kids run amok.


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Hot Rod

Rod is a lost soul
Does terrible stunts poorly
Same as Super Dave.


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Bratz: The Movie

Dolls come to big screen
Precocious, snobby bitches
Nothing to see here.


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Beneath

Christy has visions
Sees her sis buried alive
Beware the basement.


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The Bourne Ultimatum

Matt Damon is Bourne
Seeks truth about who he is
Enroute, much action.


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No Reservations

Control freak woman
Learns life can be turbulent
It is best that way.


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Skinwalkers

Warring werewolf clans
Fight for boy who can end curse
Who wins? I don't care.


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I Know Who Killed Me

Young girl is kidnapped
A-plus student or stripper?
Watch for the surprise.


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I Could Never Be Your Woman

Woman is lonely
Dates guy twenty years younger
Can the affair last?


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The Simpsons Movie

Here come the Simpsons
Screw up town, can it be saved?
Should it be saved? Nope.


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I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry

Sandler; James, best friends
Get married for benefits
Could be funnier.



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Hairspray

Fat girl wants to dance
Learns to shake from the black folk
She will rise with them.


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Bickford Shmeckler’s Cool Ideas

A nerd writes a book
Can change the world with his words
Can he get the girl?


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Diamond Dogs

Ronson -- commando
Protect Buddhist tapestry
You need the money.


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License to Wed

Zany reverend
Make couples take dumb classes
To prove they're in love.


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Interview

Meet with an actress?
Don't judge books by their covers
Hard way, lesson taught.


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Cashback

Girlfriend breaks Ben's heart
Find something else to pass time
Slow down; find new love.


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Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

Meet Harry Potter
Wizard boy, please save the day
Lord Voldemort comes!


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Captivity

Hot model kidnapped
Captor plays mind games with her
Can she out think him?


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Transformers

Robots come to earth
Fight for ultimate power
Get out of their way!


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Live Free or Die Hard

Bring country to knees
All because of bruised ego?
McClane, kick his ass.


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1408

Haunted hotel room
Beware, it feeds on your fears
Can Cusack stop it?


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Evan Almighty

God says, "build an ark"
Uplifting, but not funny
Oh well, try again.


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Ratatouille

Rat likes to cook food
Find work at French restaraunt
Life as chef is good.


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Surf’s Up

Penguins in a film?
Hasn't this been done before?
Nope, this time they surf.


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Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer

Reed and Sue married?
Must wait, Silver Surfer comes
Need Earth for "I do's".


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Rise: Blood Hunter

Vampires drink blood
Ms. Liu doesn't like the taste
Kill those that made her.


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Sicko

Documentary
Uncovering health care wrongs
What is there to do?


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Ocean’s Thirteen

Deal gone very bad
Boys have to enact revenge
Good 'ole heist movie.


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Knocked Up

Fat guy gets hot girl
Uh oh, pregnancy results
Can they co-exist?


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Mr. Brooks

Earl Brooks likes to kill
Oops, there was a crime witness
Time to say goodbye.


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Bloodlines

Backwoods, inbred folk
Need new blood to carry on
Where are the nude girls?


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Pretty Cool Too

Lots of tits and ass
Is there a storyline here?
Who cares? Tits and ass!


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Hostel: Part II

Three girls; Euro trip
Get tortured for amusement
Won't go there again.


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Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End

Arise Jack Sparrow
The pirates need you to lead
Against big business


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The Last Legion

Boy is new Caesar
Must reunite all for Rome
Just like King Arthur.


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Fired!

Girl loses her job
Feels she has to tell the world
Get over it -- please!


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Shrek the Third

The ogre returns
This time to find a new king
Nothing groundbreaking.


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28 Weeks Later

Infected return
The safe zone is overrun
Europe is not safe!


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Georgia Rule

Three women; issues
One drunk, one old, one easy
Can they get better?


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Lucky You

Play cards as a job
Little luck with friends or kin
Will turn of card help?


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Next

See in the future
Cage uses to bet on cards
Can he diffuse bomb?


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Reno 911!: Miami

Imbecile police
Make a mess of Miami
Stay in Reno, please!


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Kickin’ It Old Skool

Wake from a coma
Things have changed since the eighties
No more breakdancing.


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Spider-Man 3

Spider-Man is back
More problems -- girls and bad guys
Carry on Spidey!


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Hot Fuzz

Hero cop, get out
To countryside, fight crime there
Funny things ensue.


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Perfect Stranger

Meet people online
May bring unwanted results
Like death and herpes.


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________________________

Redline

Bet on and race cars
Yawn -- cheap imitation of
Fast and Furious.


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________________________

Disturbia

Peeping tom gets caught
By a serial killer
Next time don't meddle.


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The Hills Have Eyes II

Remake of sequel
How desperate must you be?
Hide movie in hills.


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The Reaping

Ten plagues cast by God
Hilary Swank, are they real?
Yes.  Heathens repent!


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Meet The Robinsons

Orphan boy, don't fret
The future is looking bright
Lessons taught to all.


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Mr. Bean’s Holiday

Retarded man wins
Trip to France, chaos ensues
Poor movie; avoid.


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Blades of Glory

Two men will compete
Against mixed pairs in skating
Homos can rejoice!


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I Think I Love My Wife

Chris Rock married man
Mind fued, to cheat or not to
Choose wisely my son.


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Shooter

Sniper, Marky Mark
Run! After failed kill attempt
Why bother watching?


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Premonition

Wife sees husbands death
In the future, sit and wait
Love life insurance.


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TMNT

Four green guys, apart
Together they fight as one
Save the world, turtles.


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Black Snake Moan

Black man finds white girl
Abused, naked and horny
Force her to get help.


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Fido

Strange community
Zombies among the living
Cleaning and serving.


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Outlaw

Home mayhem too much
Joins a gang to halt all crime
Too bad they are dumb.


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300

Sparta, time to fight
Three-hundred versus much more
Result? All are dead.



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________________________

Breach

Old dog sells secrets
Young fox outsmarts the elder
Cold is the prison.



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________________________

Wild Hogs

Four guys, midlife strife
Together, ride bikes, fight gang
Ain't true friendship grand?


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Bridge to Terabithia

Lost boy looks for friend
Finds a girl, new land blossoms
Happiness - short lived.


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